Thoughts

Some days I wake up feeling as if everything going on my life is as it should be. Going to school, work, living in a house with some of my best friends, and being in a town with some people I intensely care about. Other days are different. I don't question the fact that school is worth my time. I know that it's definitely NOT a waste of time. I'm learning and trying to become the person I'll be forever. Or something. But there are days where I question every single thing I do, even the simplest of things. Why did I drive to school and not ride my bike? Why am I sitting around reading the newspaper and not studying for my quiz in 30 minutes? Why did I avoid eye contact with that one girl I talked to on a regular basis last year? But even more than these silly things, I question why I am where I am. I suppose it's simple. As Dylan told me, it's not that deep, you live one place and you do stuff or you live in a different place and do stuff. But is it really just where you are that makes the difference?
For me, I've always felt secure and comfortable. Sure, I get anxious about tests or meeting new people, things of the sort, but I don't know that I've ever actually had to be out of my comfort zone. I thought college in and of itself would make me uncomfortable. But then I expected everything to just fall into place. I haven't really, truly challenged myself to get involved and therefore have met few new people. I suppose that is okay but I want more. I want to be motivated to get involved. More importantly, I want to be motivated to learn. It's really hard when I don't have a major and am taking a bunch of general classes. It's really hard to delve into those. But if there were just something that could get me going. Anything.
I have an interview with a woman from the Cooking and Hospitality Institute of Chicago today. I know I've never been the girl who's cooking dinner for everyone on the block or bringing all kinds of desserts to parties, but I really think this might be something I enjoy. I know I have to give it more thought but it has become pretty serious in my mind. It's a way for me to be creative and entertain. It's something that I could go a bunch of different ways with as far as a career. It's something I seriously desire to know more about. It would challenge me. To be honest, the idea really kind of terrifies me. Being done with college, leaving my job, leaving Nebraska, and living further away from a lot of the people I love than ever before. Could it be worth it?