i met and transported into my 4, maybe 5-year-old self and brain in my dreams last night.  i was old and i was young.  it felt like i had 2 bodies but 1 mind, each functioning a little differently depending on what body my mind was spending time in.

i stood across the room from me and watched as i pranced around my dad's seemingly ginormous dress shoes (from baby's point of view they were, anyway).

before i knew it, preemie me disappeared.

as if it was the most normal thing in the world, my parents asked where i might've run off to.  right when i needed my 5-year-old brain to function simultaneously with the other, it couldn't.  i was gone, lost.  IIII couldn't find MYSELF!  my parents were devastated.

i'm taking it as a sign.  revival of youth.  for as soon as the world seems familiar, i'm gone.  we've got to remember to let EVERYTHING in the world amaze us, or we'll be lost.

endless satisfaction, friends.

this week i think i may have experienced what so many of us are looking for.  true love.

i've been touched in all the right places.  i've received a healthy balance of the wild side and tenderness.

my very bones have been manipulated and my lover's duty is to make my vulnerable body perfect.  it is his duty to make me feel good.

i am my lover's sculpture and my body is his open book.

i leave my lover with confidence, knowing that he wants to see me twice more this week.

who needs men?  who needs FOOD?

so long as i have my chiropractor, i have endless satisfaction.

where would YOU wish to wake up tomorrow?

  

making breakfast in the middle of nowhere but really in the middle of everywhere.

with someone i love.

whatever any of that means.

SOON.

soon our bodies will be golden from the sun-
and your ARM will be wARM when i put my hand on it-
and even though i used to never know sad or lonely-
and then had both-
i know that soon-
i will forget one and the other-
and there will be a place for us to thaw our brittle winter bones-
and we will dance-
and we will play-
and we will riiiiiiiiide away!